October 10: Whereby Shall I Know?

"All God's revelations are sealed until they are opened to us by obedience."

I keep thinking there must be a way around that! This all or nothing deal is just VERY hard to live day-in and day-out. If I am doing a bunch of things right, surely it won't affect my relationship with Jesus if I slip a little in a few areas, right? WRONG!! The still, small voice of the Holy Spirit, that non-audible nudge, tells me that my actions make my communication with God full of static and my effectiveness like being slowed in rush hour traffic.

Okay, so I'm not very careful with how I take care of my body...I joined a health club, so that counts for something, right? (Oh, going once every ten days doesn't impress you very much, huh?) Yeah, I procrastinate a little, but I'm sure that other people managed to send a card or take some food, don't you think? Ouch! My disorganization has cost me in late fees, and means that I didn't pay my bill when I promised.

Somehow, I must teach myself to quit comparing my actions with other people in the world, and always use Jesus as my standard instead. If my health is bad, I don't feel like ministry. If I procrasinate, then I can't reach out to others at the time of their need. If I'm disorganized, important tasks fail to get down, and I become a disappointment. None of those things bring glory to God.

Dear Jesus, forgive me for downplaying my short-comings. Help me to ask You for strength to do those things that I don't want to do. May the children of my heart find the courage to fight their own battles, whatever they may be. Mostly, help us to see things in Your reality, not the realities of our own making.